Someone asked me recently what I thought was desirable in a mate, other than the obvious pretty face and sexy body. For myself, I believe there are three main qualities that I look for in mate selection: sincerity, loyalty, and trustworthiness.
Sincerity, to me this is the most important quality in mate selection. The potential mate must demonstrate true sincerity in their desire to be with me. They must see qualities in me that they admire and desire. Their approach must be without guile or trickery, only an innocent, honest, and raw longing to be with me.
Loyalty, the second most important quality a mate can have. Loyalty is important in a mate, especially one you wish to have children with. Loyalty means not only that they will forgo other potential lovers, but also that they will stand by you in a crisis. This is the crux of the marriage oath, and the basis of any lasting relationship.
Trustworthiness, the third pillar in the triad. I often find it hard to trust others, and this is why I feel this quality is so important. One must be able to trust one’s mate completely in order to feel safe and secure in the relationship. Trust is especially important in one you wish to take as a lover.
Each of these qualities (sincerity, loyalty, and trustworthiness) is important in mate selection. Together they form a tetrahedron: solid, sturdy, and stable. This is the basis for a great marriage. Some say that you must work at a marriage and I feel this is true, but the tetrahedron must be naturally expressed. It cannot be forced, but must be the true outflow of the flowering of love. When one sees these qualities in another, one can feel secure in the relationship, content with the knowledge that the foundations are strong and the future looks promising.